ouch

dammit i just hurt myself giving myself the trigger i think i pushed it in to far. i started bleeding when i took it out plus it hurt really bad afterwards ouch!!! hopefully that was pain of success!!! My miracle in progress!!!

woohooo

ok so i just got back from dr. appt. i'm on cd 11 and already i had 2 mature eggs on my right ovary yeah!!! 21x21 and 20x17. my left ovary had 18x21 and 12x12. i know God is working already. Thank You God for putting my mature follies on my right side. Thank You Jesus!!! so i give myself the trigger tonight and i go for my iui @ 8am tomorrow morning. i'm so excited!!!God is good and its gonna happen this cycle i can feel it. Its in God's hands and he's working it out for me right now as i type. My miracle is in progress!!!

just wondering

what would it feel like to actually get a BFP? wow i can't even imagine how I'd handle that. being me I'd probably test a million times to make sure they all said BFP!!! what would it feel like to carry a baby inside of me? sometimes I'll go into crazy Tina mode and I'll rub my stomach like there's something in there. wow imagine if there was? i would just be besides myself. what would it feel like to actually give birth? wouldn't that be amazing, giving birth to a little life that's made from love. i swear i would love that baby so much!!! oh to hold your baby in your arms after all that we've been through, that would just be a miracle!!!

praying that soon i will feel, what i can only imagine about right now, everything that goes along with becoming pregnant, carrying a child, and holding them in your arms after it all. if all this up and down craziness with infertility drugs gives me that kind of happy ending it will be well worth the pain and the expense!!! God Thank You for my miracle in advance!!! God work with these meds and bless me with a child!!!

jon and kate plus eight

i swear i envy them. i know ppl look and dread having that many children at once but i think they make such a cute and fun family. i would love to have that many children but at the rate i'm going i'd settle for just 1. who am i kidding when i have 1 i know i'm gonna want more. i just think its so cool to have such a big family like that. if i could afford it i swear i would. maybe not all six at once but eventually work myself up to it. and i was reading the amazing part is she did iui not ivf. if it can happen for her it can happen for me! didn't say if she was on injectables but pretty sure that wasn't just clomid. or maybe it was idk. can't wait to have my show "tina and nick plus six" tried to make it rhyme. lol

different

so this cycle is alot different than last cycle. last cycle i had cramps within 2 days of taking the clomid and i mean bad cramps that lasted the rest of my cycle. this cycle i had mild cramps after first pill and nothing since. kinda relieved that i'm not in pain. but i would like to be feeling something. last cycle i had 4 mature follicles. i would love to have the same this cycle on my right side of course. i keep reminding myself i turned it over to Jesus, he'll work it out. one more day of clomid then i have my first u/s on friday. can't wait to see how many there are. after that they usually schedual me 2 days later for another u/s then trigger. i can't wait i'm so excited about this cycle. its gonna happen i believe it. MIRACLE IN PROGRESS!!!

clomid and so much hope!!!

ok so tonite was my first pill of my second round of clomid!!! woohoo grow follies grow. just to be clear grow on the right side not the left!!!(if u didn't know left tube is blocked) i'm so excited about this cycle i really believe our miracle is gonna happen this cycle. i know its gonna happen i believe in it, i trust God so know i'm thanking him in advance for our lil miracle!! THANK YOU JESUS!!!

clomid, clomid, just took my 1st pill 3 hrs ago and i'm already cramping. i had cramps really bad last cycle so i'm prepared because i know at the end of all this i'll have to endure alot more pain than this and i welcome it. i'm excited about morning sickness,i know i'm crazy. i'm excited about getting bigger and watching our lil miracle grow inside me. i excited to give birth. i just feel so good about this cycle. clomid worked very well last cycle, 4 mature follies they were just on the wrong ovary lol but this cycle is the one. i can feel it. i just sit and smile because i'm not worried at all this is meant to be and this is God's will. Jesus take the wheel!!!!! me and nick are gonna have our BFP soon i believe in it, and shall come to pass!!! THANK YOU JESUS FOR OUR BABY!!!

i miss my husband

so here's my story, my hubby is in the army and last tuesday he left for a 1 year deployment. he's in training for two months then he gets a 4 day leave then off he goes over seas. today i just broke down while i was driving home. just really hit me that my baby is gonna be gone for a whole year. i miss him so much already and its only been a week. what am i gonna do for a whole year? that man is my rock, i don't know what i'm gonna do without him. we've got this last cycle to get pregnant, we froze his sperm, if not we'll have to wait til next june when he gets home. damn a whole year he'll be 30 the next time i see him God i hope this year flies by i miss him so much already what's it gonna be like in a couple of months i think i'll be crazy!!!